The Woodhouse House: 06.2008

I got this as a forward today from another mean mom. Thanks, Shannon, for the forward.

Mean Moms

Someday when my
children are old enough to
Understand the logic that motivates a parent,

I will tell them, as my Mean Mom told me:
I loved you enough to ask where you
were going, with whom,
And what time you would be home.

I loved you
enough to be silent and let you
discover that your new best friend was a
creep.

I loved you enough to stand over you for
two hours while you
cleaned your room,
a job that should have taken 15 minutes.

I loved you enough to
let you see anger,
disappointment, and
tears in my eyes. Children
must learn that their
parents aren't perfect..

I loved you enough to let you assume
The responsibility for your actions even when the
penalties were so harsh
they almost broke my heart.

But most of all, I loved you enough to say
NO when I knew you would hate me for it.

Those were the most
difficult battles of all.
I'm glad I won them, because in
the end you won, too.
And someday when your children are old enough
To understand the logic that motivates parents,
you will tell them.

Was your Mom
mean?

I know mine was.
We had the meanest
mother in the whole world!
While other kids ate candy for breakfast,
we had to have cereal, eggs, and toast.

When others had a Pepsi and a
Twinkie for lunch,
we had to eat sandwiches.

And you can guess our
mother fixed us a dinner that was
different from what other kids had, too.

Mother insisted on knowing where we were at all
times. You'd think we were convicts in a prison.

She had to know who our friends were
and what we were doing with them.
She insisted that if we said we
would be gone for an hour,
we would be gone for an hour or less.

We were ashamed to admit it,
but she had the nerve to break
the Child Labor Laws by making us work.

We had to wash the dishes,
make the beds, learn to cook,
vacuum the floor, do laundry,
empty the trash and all sorts of cruel jobs.

I think she would lie awake at night
thinking of more things for us to do.

She always insisted on us telling the truth,
the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
By the time we were teenagers,
she could read our minds and had eyes
in the back of her head.

Then, life was really tough!

Mother wouldn't let our friends just honk
the horn when they drove up
They had to come up to the door
so she could meet them.

While everyone else could date
when they were 12 or 13,
we had to wait until we were 16.

Because of our mother
we missed out on lots of things other
kids experienced.

None of us have ever
been caught shoplifting,
vandalizing other's property or
ever arrested for any crime.
It was all her fault.

Now that we have left home,
we are all educated, honest adults.
We are doing our best to be mean parents
just like Mom was.

I think that is what's wrong
with the world today.
It just doesn't have enough mean
moms!